Wanna become a volunteer?

Of late I've been getting quite a number of emails from some silent blog readers asking me about my voluntary work. Questions range from how to be a volunteer... what do we need to be a volunteer... what are the do's and don'ts of becoming a volunteer... what kind of NGOs are the best to join... what do I get from my voluntary work etc.

How I wish those who asked were staying in or around Ipoh... I would have coaxed them to join Buddies and offer to give them hands on training.

But frankly, as someone who had only seriously became a volunteer 5 years ago, I consider myself still green to be any sort of "consultant" on the subject of volunteering.

Oh yes, before joining Buddies, I did join a few associations but never really found one that suited my needs. I had been looking around for NGOs where I could offer my service to the community but I didn't really know what kind of service I could offer since I didn't have anything special to offer. And somehow the NGOs I joined before were more "general" - I wasn't really exposed to the trials and tribulations of the people in need.

So when someone told me about an NGO providing support service to people living with HIV, which was looking for more volunteers, especially Malay volunteers, I gave it a shot. And guess what, it had all the ingredients I was looking for - low profile, no glam, no politicking, first hand exposure to the lives of the people we're dealing with.

Of course, that doesn't mean you have to join an NGO like mine. If any of you want to become a volunteer, consider your own needs and expectations. Some people may be better off joining high profile NGOs. Some may not be suitable in NGOs like Buddies where we have to deal with people's emotions. They may not be able to take it.

So think thoroughly before you choose what kind of NGOs you'd like to join. And before you join, make sure you are able to commit some time to your voluntary work. Otherwise you may just end up having to frustrate your fellow volunteers when they expect you to join them for some activities but you're always not available.

Having said all that, if you are interested to do voluntary work like mine, dealing with people first hand, here are some tips for you:

#1. Don't be judgmental. What you see on the cover need not necessarily reflect the contents. There are always reasons why people do what they do. So no matter how wrong you think they are, give them the benefit of the doubt.

#2. Learn to listen, especially during the first few contacts. No matter how tempted you are to advise them to do this and that, make sure you let them open up first. The important thing is to gain their trust. Show some empathy. If you are the one who does most of the talking during the first few contacts, chances are they may not want to contact you later because.... errmmm... you talk too much... ;) Once they trust you, they themselves would contact you later to ask for advise/help.

#3. Don't jump to conclusions after listening to one side of the story. Try to find out the other side of the story. For example, someone may tell her sad story of being discriminated by her family etc, but for all we know, she's the one giving problems to the family. So yeah, try to get to know the family as well.

#4. Be sincere in what you do - give em your heart. When you're not sincere, you'd easily get fed up. Oh yes, sometimes I do get physically and mentally tired when I give my heart to the families needing help, but when the end result turns out well, the feeling is... PRICELESS! Hilang letih! Of course, you have to accept that sometimes when things don't turn out the way you wish they would, you do tend to get frustrated. You will then need to just let go.

#5. Don't get too emotionally involved. Ahh... this is a tough one, I admit, especially when it needs to go hand in hand with #4. It's hard to give something/someone your heart while at the same time avoiding emotional attachments. I myself sometimes find this rather difficult, especially after having spent a lot of time with a particular person/family. (yeah, look what happened when I spent so much time with my little Cek Mek - I miss her already!) You need to be keras hati. For me, when my emotions begin to play, I'd make myself busy with other things - like blogging... haha! (In other words, this blog is not only meant for creating awareness, it's also a place for me to de-stress!) Just like office work - you must never bring home problems at the office. It's the same thing with voluntary work.

5 tips for my 5 years in Buddies... :)

Remember... in whatever that you do, always try to think of the brighter side of things.

As to the question of what I get from my voluntary work - SELF SATISFACTION AND A WHOLE LOT OF LESSONS ON LIFE. You see, my PLHIV clients don't give me problems, they give me lessons (without them realising it, of course).

So, anyone care to join Buddies? We're short of volunteers you know... :)