Family Day : My Observations

Although during our Family Day outing last Sunday, we made sure we didn’t mention anything about HIV or related topics, I still managed to observe the PLWHA families, especially those under my care.

Hey, why the raised eye-brow? Just because I was enjoying myself silly, it didn’t mean I never bothered to observe the people around me, okay?! I always like to observe people (although I don’t usually notice things like new jewellery or new watch or the likes as I am not bothered by them) and so even while sliding down the Tube Raiders…

OR

Cliff Racer…

OR floating along the Adventure River… passing by the big monkey (not a blogger) with the bulging tummy…

I still OBSERVE people!

Of course, there may be other people observing me… and probably wondering why on earth was this makcik behaving like a hyperactive child (*chuckle*)… but I was not at all bothered by that.

I was actually observing how they got along with each other…

What I noticed was that there were a few groups. One group was the not-getting-wet mothers group. They sat there chit-chatting while watching over their children who were having fun getting themselves all wet. In this group were Yah, Fuzi and Aini and they were accompanied by a trainee volunteer who also did not want to get wet.

Zainab and Mrs. K did make friends with them but at the same time they had younger kids who needed to be supervised at the pool while Mr. K was not feeling well enough to be moving around too much. So he just sat under the hut and relaxed.

It was nice to note that Mrs. K’s 12 year old daughter and Aini’s 13 year old daughter got along really well as though they had known each other for years. In fact while I was floating along the adventure river they were on another tube nearby and kept warning me, “Makcik jaga-jaga Makcik, nanti basah!” every time we were about to pass any sensor-activated “animals” (monkeys, frogs, whatever) which would spray water on us when we pass by. Yeah, right, jaga-jaga nanti basah… as though we weren’t already wet…

On the contrary, Shila’s daughter Laila was so attached to her mother that she didn’t make any new friends despite there being a few other children around her age. As a matter of fact, she got along better with Jah, the happy-go-lucky PLWHA who became close friends with Shila ever since they met during the International Aids Memorial Day (IAMD) in May. But Jah can actually get along well with simply anybody… even the Thai lady (married to a Malaysian Chinese) who couldn’t speak Malay or English. How did they communicate? Like chicken and duck…

There was one particular PLWHA I was interested to get to know. From day one at the HIV clinic, Miera, a young Malay lady, specified that she didn’t want a Malay buddy. Initially she was also to attend the IAMD in May, but when she found out that the accompanying buddy was a Malay lady (yours truly lah) she was quite reluctant. She withdrew. She was afraid that fellow Malays would look down on her, it didn’t matter that her buddy (a Chinese lady) told her many times that I was alright. So when Miera joined our Family Day outing, I thought it was a good chance to get her to mix with the rest without having any fear of being looked down upon.

What I noticed was that Miera was the quiet type. Yes, she finally did make some new friends with other PLWHAs, Malays and non-Malays, but she didn’t really talk much. Since she was single, she didn’t have any kids to look after and so she joined us volunteers… Malays, Chinese, Indians… for the fun rides and slides. When we queued up for the Cliff Racer, coincidentally I was right behind her and so she had no choice but to become my partner sharing one tube. And while climbing up to the starting point of the slides, she finally talked to me! I gave her the choice whether she wanted to sit in front or at the back when sliding down. Just like my fellow volunteer who partnered me for the Tube Raider, Miera too preferred the back seat for the Cliff Racer! (I guess they were thinking whatever happens let me face it first!!)

Well, thank God I didn’t break any bones in me, but the Cliff Racer definitely broke the ice between me and Miera.

At the end of the day, some of the PLWHAs did exchange phone numbers, but knowing them, the “credit habis” excuse will be used most of the time when I ask them if they have been contacting each other…

Buddies and the lost world...

When I told some of my PLWHA families to be at the bus station before 9 am, I had expected them to be there earliest 8.45 am. But at 8.10 am as I was getting ready at home, Yah called me to say she and her children were already at the bus station. Oh well, it was before 9 am...

Anyway, right after I arrived, Shila and daughter Laila got there, followed by Jah and then Mr. K's family. So I got one guy (he's a PLWHA but volunteered to be one of the pickup person) to ferry Mr. K's family, one lady volunteer to ferry Yah and her children, while I waited there together with Jah, Shila and Laila for the arrival of another PLWHA, Kamala. Kamala arrived rather late as her bus stopped at almost every small town before reaching Ipoh.

But oh well, although we were the last to reach the park, the timing was just nice as the park opens at 10 am and we arrived there just minutes before opening hours. By the time we got there my fellow volunteers had already organised things for the rest who had reached there earlier.

OK, so people.... welcome to the LOST WORLD OF TAMBUN...

This is the main pool.

We didn't waste much time after we got in. After bringing them to our reserved hut and briefing them on what time to gather for lunch, we were all off to look for whatever fun available at the theme park. There were a few who preferred not to get wet, so they were our official "tukang jaga barang"...

I didn't waste much time either. After changing into my errr... three piece suit... (long sleeved t-shirt, trackbottom and headscarf) I was actually one of the first to try out the water slides on the tubes! Hey, I needed to test if the slides were safe for the rest, okay? ;) (hehehe... yeah, sure!)






This is supposed to be the kiddies pool. But look at the adults crowding there waiting to be splashed by the water from the barrel up there...

The kiddies pool was even safe for toddlers. Look at this little girl here crawling in the kiddies pool.

It was quite difficult getting the kids to gather themselves back at our reserved hut for lunch. They were enjoying themselves so much they simply didn't want to get out of the water! And after lunch we originally planned to have telematch, but since the kids were so eager to continue with whatever fun rides and slides available, we decided to cancel the telematch and let them do as they like...

Well, I decided not to get wet after lunch, so together with a few other volunteers, we went for the dry rides. First, the pirate ship, swinging from one end to another, which sent some of my colleagues screaming. It was a blessing none of them threw up... our timing wasn't really proper, you see... this was immediately after a heavy serving of nasi beriani for lunch!!

Then we took the tram ride around Lost World of Tambun before we proceeded to the spinning chairs.





No, this is not the spinning chair I was talking about. This is less thrilling so I decided to skip this one and wait for the spinning chair. That's why I managed to get this pic... I wasn't on it! But despite it being less thrilling, a few fellow volunteers took the ride and screamed anyway.

Some of my friends who took the ride above decided against trying the spinning chair but our secretary who insist on trying every available ride took the ride together with me and another male volunteer. The male volunteer who joined the ride initially didn't want to try the spinning chair ride but when he found out I wanted to go for it, he said, "Alamak, kalau you naik I pun kena naik jugaklah. Kalau tak tergugatlah aku." At the end of the spinning chair ride, our secretary who insisted on trying everything had to be helped off her chair... hehehe...

Then off we went to see the tiger feeding show.

Many years ago when I was in upper six, I had a poster of a tiger on my room door at the hostel. I remembered a few juniors who passed by my room, upon seeing the picture of the tiger, they'd exclaim, "Eh, eh... gambar Kak Pi!" (I was the headgirl at that time, so you get the drift lah.) So now let's see if any of these tigers look like me...

After the tiger feeding show, those who wanted to take pictures with a snake were allowed to do so. No, I did not, but some of us did...

If you are afraid of snakes but insist on trying everything including taking pictures with those slithing creatures, this is how you'll look like in the pic! Meet our secretary...

After tea, we handed over presents for each child. We made sure nobody went home empty handed. After that we made a move. Although the children would still like to stay until 6 pm if only they could, the older people simply could not take it any more...

The PLWHAs and their children had a great time I know. So did the volunteers. I enjoyed myself for sure. For the whole day I felt like a teenager all over again!

That was until I got home... and then my aching body screamed...

HOI WOMAN, YOUR TEENAGE DAYS ARE LOOOONG OVER!!!

Ouch!

All set to go!

Park arrangements...
*Booking.... done.
*Informed them of the menu of our choice for lunch and tea... done.
*Full payment... done.
*Called up for final arrangements for the day... done.
-->PARK ARRANGEMENTS : CHECK!

Transportation for PLWHA families...
*Checked with families how they are going for the family day... done.
*Those needing people to fetch them up at home, arranged for buddies to fetch them... done.
*Those from outstation coming by bus and need people to pick them up at the bus station; arranged for a few buddies to wait at the bus station... done.
-->TRANSPORTATION FOR PLWHA FAMILIES : CHECK!

Prizes and presents...
*Sorted out prizes for the telematch... done.
*Sorted out presents for all the children so that none of them will go home empty handed... done.
-->PRIZES AND PRESENTS : CHECK!

-->INFORMED BUDDIES OF FINAL ARRANGEMENTS : CHECK!

-->RECHARGED BATTERIES FOR CAMERA : CHECK!

-->SPARE CASH FOR CONTINGENCIES : CHECK!

We're all set for tomorrow's Family Day - a great opportunity for me to introduce my PLWHA clients to each other... a great opportunity to get them to form a peer support group amongst themselves...

BUT... oh well, I'll probably be too busy the whole day to initiate all that.

Busy??? Busy enjoying myself lah... somewhere around here...

Here's a scenery from the place where we're going tomorrow....

See you later, folks!

Help needed to find missing person (Updated)

UPDATE 7th August 2007:
Salhi Khaessa Ahmad has been located!! He was found weak and confused, wandering in Kuala Lipis. The district hospital there sent him to Kuantan GH. Luckily someone who had read about him recognised him and called his parents. Thanks to all who had passed the info around and to all who had offered their prayers for Salhi and his family.




Original post:

Looking at the picture above, some people may think the guy's big enough to take care of himself. He looks normal and healthy. But the fact is, this guy, SALHI KHAESSA AHMAD, has mental illness and his family has been desperately looking for him since he went missing on July 13th 2007. A police report has been made, but since he is already 26, the case is not given priority.

Below is an email from his sister, Dr Najmiah Ahmad:
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Salam,Hi all.
I know this is about to become like me airing my dirty laundry for the world to know, but I feel so desperate. I need to tell this to you girls.

My brother Salhi has been ill with a psychiatric illness.Schizophrenia to be precise. He is 26 and he started having mental disturbance at 17 when he was in MCKK lagi.He was the genius of the family, the badut of the family and the best little brother anyone could ever wish for.

Past 10 years saw him deteriorating and my heart sgt sgt sebak when this time, I went to the hospital in KB to find him locked up in a cage, together with people I would not even look at, bcos they scare me. He had extra muscular twitches and gaunt facial expression. Memang tak nampak mcm my used to be little brother anymore. In between bites of coney dog ( dia suka A&W) he managed to tell me 'Nak sekolah balik Kak Mie please '. Repeatedly. I just held back tears.

We took him out, and he was stable during my wedding. Masa reception I kept him occupied with a camera so people don't feel obliged to make a petty talk with a 'weird' looking man. Everything was fine.

On Friday the 13th, he left home saying he wanted to go for a walk. RM 3.50 in his pocket. He never came back. Duit tak ada, IC tak ada. We looked for him everywhere, satu Kelantan. No news.

He hasn't taken his medications for 2 weeks now, I tak tahulah how he is now. Mungkin kalau you all jalan2 kat KL nampak budak gila (i have to accept this now) talking to himself, kotor, kurus tak terurus, kejap cakap english kejap cakap kelantan, that's him. Let me know.

What i fear is that he got hit by a lorry ke, in a ditch somewhere waiting to be found. I am writing almost with tears all the time. Partly because I am frustrated there wasn't much time for me in Malaysia, to do anything. Police report has been filed and my other brother has written in the Star. Now this waiting game is making me very apprehensive..

Usually he'll find means to go back to Kuala Kangsar. 2 kali he was found in MCKK in the past. His memory seemed to have stopped at that point in hislife. Allah sahajalah yang tahu why he is tested this far. To him he is still 17.

Doakan so he's looked after by people yang he come across, who would find sympathy in them to give him food and a place to shut his eyes. Insy. Amiin. And I am sorry if anybody finds this upsetting.

Love,Najmiah
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And here's a second email from Najmiah:

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I go through a cycle of optimism and pessimism. Looking at how he was found last time after 4 days missing , by the roadside, cengkung and dishevelled, makan tak minum tak tidur tak, I just hope he's still alive.

On the cause of his illness, I am not the best to outline the cause, but what i know is always complained about being bullied in MCKK. To what extent we didn't know because at the time it's our fault we thought he was 'just saying it'. So nobody paid attention to his complaints.

After getting some prize money for his 8As PMR from a Japanese Minister he ran away from school but not to home, but to KL. When we found him he said he couldn;t stand school. Nak balik rumah takut my dad marah. My dad took him out of school and he went to a school in Kelantan. Towards his SPM he was getting worse but managed 2A1 - Physics and Add Maths. Already on tablet he joined the flying school, he was always fascinated by airplanes, always wanted to be a pilot. Half a year he was there (Kedah i think) they found his tablets and he was expelled. He took a turn for the worse.

When he got slightly better I got him enrolled in a private college. He received a best student award when he was on this medication tradename Domatil. Somehow the tablet was stopped ( pricey I think) and he was on Risperidone ( for those medics who are interested) , he is never stable since and he couldn't sit his exams.

To what extent was he bullied? Was it very bad that he couldn't tell anyone? Sexually? Or was he already 'crazy' so people bullied him? Chicken ke egg ke. I reserve my comments for now on boarding schools. May he returns safe. Amiin.

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And this is the link to the article in the Star:
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2007/7/27/nation/18416888&sec=nation


Anyone who has seen him please contact his father, En. Ahmad at 09-786 6040, 017-970 3227 or 012-296 2642.

The troubles the already troubled have to go through...

Remember I mentioned earlier that Yah wanted to withdraw her EPF to buy a piece of land and a house she can call her own home so that she need not worry about being chased out again by the present landlord?

And in one of my earlier postings titled “When the poor need help”, I also mentioned the kind of troubles the poor need to go through to get help… even in withdrawing their own money?

Let’s see what Yah has to go through in withdrawing her EPF money…

First and foremost, when withdrawing EPF under permanent disability, a medical report needs to be produced. Since Yah’s checkups and follow-ups are all done at the GH, all she needed to do was to get a copy of her medical report from the hospital. Just go to the medical records unit and apply for the report. Within a month, if there are no complications, they will post the report to you.

Sounds easy? Well, for the average person, maybe so. But for the poor where even a single sen matters, it’s not that easy. To get the medical report, a fee of RM40 needs to be paid to get a medical officer signing the report, or RM80 if you want a specialist to sign it. If a report is signed by a specialist, then when the medical report is submitted to the EPF, the applicant need not go to any panel clinics appointed by EPF. Since Yah could not afford to pay RM80, she opted for the report to be signed by an MO – even then the RM40 was already a substantial amount for her.

When I left Yah at the EPF office on the day of my last clinic duty (after she received the medical report from the hospital), I had already briefed her on what to expect. I told her that EPF would request her to go to 2 of EPF’s panel clinic to confirm the medical report that she submitted with her EPF withdrawal application. I advised her to specifically ask the EPF officers to let her do her medical checkup at any panel clinics located in northern Perak so that Yah wouldn’t have to travel so far.

Just about 2 weeks before that, when I brought Ani to EPF office for the same purpose, she was told to go to a private clinic in Ipoh while the other panel clinic was Pusat Kesihatan UTP, within UTP’s compounds. I thought that since Ani stays in a nearby town, that was why she was sent to UTP.

Much to my surprise, when Yah showed me her letters, she was supposed to go to the 2 same panel clinics that Ani was sent to. I asked why she didn’t ask for a nearer clinic. Yah said she already did, but the EPF officer told her they didn’t have any nearer clinic, the 2 clinics were all they could offer.

Seriously, EPF is such a big organization… surely they’d have panel clinics all over the state? The fact that the applicants had to submit medical reports already indicate they have medical problems. To add to that most of these applicants (or at least those whom I’m helping out) are from poor families. Although they don’t have to pay any fee to the panel clinics, traveling still requires money! I can understand EPF’s need to confirm the medical reports submitted by asking the applicants to go to EPF’s appointed panel clinics, but why trouble them by asking them to travel so far to get that done?

Yah was worried even about finding the clinic in Ipoh. The only places she’s familiar with in Ipoh are the bus station and the hospital. But I told her not to worry about the clinic in Ipoh as I knew the place and I’d take her there.

Just to come to Ipoh, Yah needs to take 3 buses at least: One from her kampong to the nearest town… then from that town to a bigger town… and finally from the bigger town to Ipoh. Asking her to go all the way to UTP would mean she’d have to take another bus to a town she was not familiar with. She doesn’t even know what bus to take. Okay, she can ask around, but the bus would stop right outside UTP. We’re talking about a university here… can you imagine how far she’d have to walk in to get to the clinic?

The letters given by EPF indicated that she was supposed to go to the clinics last Thursday. After giving it much consideration, I didn’t have the heart to let her go to UTP on her own. So when she called me saying that she was already at the Ipoh bus station, I immediately called the clinic in UTP to confirm that the doctor was in. Ani had told me earlier that she had to go twice because the first time she went the doctor was not in. The lady who answered the call said the doctor was in.

So after I fetched Yah at the bus station, I immediately drove her to UTP. When we got to the clinic and showed the EPF letter to the reception, we were told they had not received the letter from EPF (EPF is supposed to send letters direct to the clinic where the applicants are sent to) and therefore were unable to confirm her medical report as they had no idea what Yah’s reported ailments were and they were supposed to confirm Yah’s health condition on a specific form provided by EPF. They said maybe the letter from EPF had already reached UTP’s admin, but the letter had not reached the clinic. When the clinic assistants found out that Yah had to come all the way from Northern Perak, they were sympathetic and tried to help. They said they’d try to call their admin office and ask the people there to send the EPF letter (if any) to the clinic, but they didn’t dare confirm that it would be there by afternoon or even the next day. Were we supposed to wait there for something that wasn’t even confirmed?

I decided not to wait. Yah had another clinic to go to so I drove her back to Ipoh to send her to the other panel clinic. Not much problem at this clinic. Everything was done fast. I then took Yah for lunch before sending her to the bus station. She asked if she should come back on Monday, but I told her to wait for my call. I will have to call the clinic first, ask them if the letter is ready AND ask them if the doctor would be in. Then only I’ll tell Yah to come.

Came Monday, I called the UTP clinic, and again I was told they have not received the letter from EPF. No point asking Yah to come. It will be a waste of time, money and energy. The girl at the clinic took down my number and promised to call me once she gets any news. This morning the girl from the clinic called me. She told me that even UTP admin confirmed that they HAD NOT received any letters from EPF on Yah’s matter and therefore even if I brought Yah there today, they would still not be able to help. Yah will have no choice but to go back to EPF.

So I called Yah, told her to go to EPF and explain the whole matter to them and if possible, to appeal to them to let her go to another panel clinic in Ipoh so that she wouldn’t have to go all the way back to UTP.

I still don’t understand why the EPF officer decided to send Yah all the way to UTP to do her checkup. Was it really necessary to get Yah to travel more than 150 kms away from her house to confirm her medical report when there are so many other clinics to choose from?

I feel like asking the officers for the reasons behind their decision but I can already imagine their reaction, “Awak ni siapa?” (Oh yes, I’ve received that kind of reaction before! Probably some people think I’m one of those scumbags who take advantage of unsuspecting poor victims.) And chances are they’d give the same answer given to Yah… that there is no nearer clinic. They can fool Yah but please… EPF can only offer 2 panel clinics in the whole of Perak? I know for a fact there are other panel clinics in Ipoh. The least they could have done was to get Yah to do both her checkups in Ipoh… at least she didn’t have to travel from one town to another town. And in this case, due to the inefficiency, not only did she have to travel so far; she traveled so far for nothing. She could have used the money to buy food and other household necessities.

As I mentioned earlier, all Yah wants to do is withdraw HER OWN MONEY so she can buy a small piece of land and an old house she can call her own. She doesn’t want to worry about the prospect of being chased out by the present landlord again…

An aunt of Yah’s has indicated that she wants to sell off her piece of land (with an old house already built on it) within the same kampong that Yah is staying in now. Yah had indicated to her aunt that she wants to buy it from her once she gets her EPF money. Hopefully Yah can get her money before the aunt decides to sell to someone else. At least if she can stay in the same kampong she doesn’t have to worry about transferring her children to another school.

On a lighter note, the doctor at the panel clinic in Ipoh (the one Yah had already gone to) told Yah that there should be no problem getting her application approved. The only hiccup now is to get over one more panel clinic. Hopefully the next time Yah comes down everything will be settled. I dread the possibility of the poor woman having to travel up and down a few more times without getting any conclusive results...

Update 1st August 2007:

Yah went to the EPF office today and did as I told her to do - explain about the problem at UTP clinic and to appeal for the 2nd panel clinic to be in Ipoh. The EPF officer actually had a few options and finally told her to go to panel clinic in Ipoh town. I took her there this afternoon and everything is now settled. If only they had given her that clinic or any other Ipoh clinic in the first place things would have been much easier for Yah...