I was on my way to Fuzi’s house today when I suddenly remembered that Razif was supposed to go for his appointment this morning. Remember Razif, the guy who didn’t know how to break the news to his wife? Well, I suggested to him to just tell his wife that the doctor had asked him to bring her along for his appointment and then let the doctor break the news of his HIV to his wife. He thought it was a good idea.
I wasn’t on clinic duty today. So I decided to call my colleague who was on duty to find out. According to my colleague, while Razif came for his appointment, his wife didn’t come along. He has not even told his wife about his appointment at the hospital! “Takde masa lagi nak bagitau”, so he said.
Please lah… he sees his wife day in day out at home. It’s not that he has yet to find the time to tell his wife – he simply finds it hard to open his mouth to tell his wife he has HIV. I can understand that. But takde masa? Takde masa my foot!
Today Razif got the results of his blood test. His CD4 is only 36. My guess is that he was infected for quite some time already; so chances are his wife may have been infected too. He really needs to get his wife tested. But to do that, he must first tell his wife that he himself has been infected. Now that he blew his chances of getting his wife to come along with him to the hospital today, I wonder what will be his next move. With such a low CD4 count, he will need to start with his ARV medication. Will the wife not suspect anything then? I guess we will just have to wait and see.
Back to Fuzi, I promised her I’d visit today. So this afternoon after buying some fast food for the children, off I went to Fuzi’s house. As Fuzi opened the door, the first child as always greeting me at the door with a big smile was Ijam, the infected child. He came up with an even bigger smile when I handed over the fast food I brought along.
Ijam will start schooling next year. Next week will be his appointment with the pediatrician, and Fuzi will be discussing with the doctor about Ijam’s medication. For the moment he needs to take his medication 4 times a day – which will be troublesome when he starts going to school. Very likely he will need to change to taking the medication twice a day.
Anyway, remember I mentioned in my posting here about Faiz, Ijam’s older brother, being caught smoking in school? Well, I actually got the wrong info. You see, Fuzi’s exact words when she told me earlier were “Dia ditangkap tengah menghisap dengan kawan-kawan”. Fuzi didn’t elaborate further then, so I assumed she meant hisap rokok. Boy was I wrong!
When Fuzi told me today that Faiz bukan hisap rokok, I was thinking… oh God… don’t tell me it’s hisap dadah? Hisap gam?! These are 10 year olds we’re talking about.
But I guess nothing was going to surprise me anymore. I’ve met people like Lily, who had to lead such a complicated life; I’ve met people like Zana, the problematic young woman; I’ve met people like Zali, whose wife actually left him and their 2 young kids (she never came back for the kids); I’ve met people like Hasnah who on record doesn’t exist; I’ve met people like Anita who is 22 but has yet to get her IC done due to some complicated problems. I figured I’ve met them all.
“Dia hisap apa?” I asked Fuzi, and I was prepared not to be shocked with whatever that Fuzi was going to tell me. Or so I thought.
“Hisap kemaluan”, came the answer.
What the…???!!
God help me please. I wonder what other kind of stories I will encounter in the course of my voluntary work…
I wasn’t on clinic duty today. So I decided to call my colleague who was on duty to find out. According to my colleague, while Razif came for his appointment, his wife didn’t come along. He has not even told his wife about his appointment at the hospital! “Takde masa lagi nak bagitau”, so he said.
Please lah… he sees his wife day in day out at home. It’s not that he has yet to find the time to tell his wife – he simply finds it hard to open his mouth to tell his wife he has HIV. I can understand that. But takde masa? Takde masa my foot!
Today Razif got the results of his blood test. His CD4 is only 36. My guess is that he was infected for quite some time already; so chances are his wife may have been infected too. He really needs to get his wife tested. But to do that, he must first tell his wife that he himself has been infected. Now that he blew his chances of getting his wife to come along with him to the hospital today, I wonder what will be his next move. With such a low CD4 count, he will need to start with his ARV medication. Will the wife not suspect anything then? I guess we will just have to wait and see.
Back to Fuzi, I promised her I’d visit today. So this afternoon after buying some fast food for the children, off I went to Fuzi’s house. As Fuzi opened the door, the first child as always greeting me at the door with a big smile was Ijam, the infected child. He came up with an even bigger smile when I handed over the fast food I brought along.
Ijam will start schooling next year. Next week will be his appointment with the pediatrician, and Fuzi will be discussing with the doctor about Ijam’s medication. For the moment he needs to take his medication 4 times a day – which will be troublesome when he starts going to school. Very likely he will need to change to taking the medication twice a day.
Anyway, remember I mentioned in my posting here about Faiz, Ijam’s older brother, being caught smoking in school? Well, I actually got the wrong info. You see, Fuzi’s exact words when she told me earlier were “Dia ditangkap tengah menghisap dengan kawan-kawan”. Fuzi didn’t elaborate further then, so I assumed she meant hisap rokok. Boy was I wrong!
When Fuzi told me today that Faiz bukan hisap rokok, I was thinking… oh God… don’t tell me it’s hisap dadah? Hisap gam?! These are 10 year olds we’re talking about.
But I guess nothing was going to surprise me anymore. I’ve met people like Lily, who had to lead such a complicated life; I’ve met people like Zana, the problematic young woman; I’ve met people like Zali, whose wife actually left him and their 2 young kids (she never came back for the kids); I’ve met people like Hasnah who on record doesn’t exist; I’ve met people like Anita who is 22 but has yet to get her IC done due to some complicated problems. I figured I’ve met them all.
“Dia hisap apa?” I asked Fuzi, and I was prepared not to be shocked with whatever that Fuzi was going to tell me. Or so I thought.
“Hisap kemaluan”, came the answer.
What the…???!!
God help me please. I wonder what other kind of stories I will encounter in the course of my voluntary work…
17 comments:
Komen Pak Malim kucing ray yg alim.
Kita selalu baca di akhbar bahawa kanak2 zaman sekarang memang lebih 'advance' dlm kegiatan seksual, berbanding dgn dulu-dulu, kata Pak Malim sambil memakai kot bulu. Saya fikir budak lelaki lebih 'advance' sikit dari perempuan, lebih2 lagi dlm melakukan hisap-menghisap, kata Pak Malim sambil memegang bulu kasap. Mungkin kerana perasaan ingin tahu, dan didorong oleh pengaruh kawan2 yang lebih 'berpengalaman'. Saya harap anak2 ini masih boleh dibimbing, kata Pak Malim sambil memegang lembing.
Astaghfirullah....Kak Pi, this is sooooo scary! To think that my son is just going to primary one next year... May Allah bless you, Kak Pi for whatever you have to go thru in the course of your voluntary work! It's really admirable!
Pak Malim,
Apalah nak jadi sekarang ni, kata Pi anak Pak Bani. Macam2 perkara yang berlaku, tambahnya lagi sambil menggigit kuku. Budak2 ni perlu diberi bimbingan, kata Pi Bani sambil menyinsing lengan. InsyaAllah, masih belum terlambat, katanya sambil menelan ubat.
Ms Hart,
Yes, scary isn't it? Especially when you have young children around the same age. Ngeri dibuatnya...
Pi,
Ada anak susah, tak ada anak pun susah. Kekadang ibu bapa pun cuai dengan tidak meletak VCD lucah ditempat yang sesuai sehingga anak-anak kecil dapat memain dan menontonnya tanpa pengetahuan ibu bapa.
Pak Zawi,
Kadang2 tu bukannya ada VCD lucah pun di rumah - cuma mungkin ada budak2 ni dapat supply VCD lucah dari luar and sorok2 tengok kat rumah masa mak bapak takde kat rumah. Dalam kes anak Fuzi ni, kemungkinan besar dia diajak kawan-kawan buat perangai tak senonoh tu.
Fuzi dah pun pesan kat cikgu sekolah to take whatever actions necessary if si Faiz gets into trouble again.
Laaaaaaaaaa, kata kak teh sambil mulut ternganga! sumpah, kak teh ingat hisap dadah. Apa dah nak jadi ni? and you said they are ten?
Laaaaaaa, masih mulut ternganga.
Kak Teh,
Jangan menganga lama sangat, nanti mulut dimasuk dek langau, kata Pi Bani dengan suara sengau.
Sungguhlah Kak Teh, even in my wildest dream I would never have imagined THAT to be the problem. Terkejut beruk dibuatnya!
Astaghfirullahhalazim...
i'll just skip that one and touch on razif's case instead. as i suggested, he only needs to lie. just tell the wife he was a junkie. although not quite end of story as she may still blow her top off BUT...at least his marriage will not be at stake.
Kerp,
Even if he wants to tell his wife he was a junkie, it will still be hard for him to open his mouth to say he has HIV. And I wouldn't say for sure his marriage will not be at stage - remember Zali the junkie? His wife not only left him, she left the kids as well!!
It's true however that in many of the cases I've seen so far, the wives are indeed more forgiving if the husbands did not main kayu tiga.
Ooops... typo error - I meant stake, not stage.
there, you even said it yourself in the 2nd para. lets put it this way akak; getting yourself stoned is a lesser sin than screwing a girl behind your spouse's back.
Pi, like you, never ever in a million years (if i lived tht long!) wud i think its THAT! In this case I have to solely blame our people for not talking about sex to their kids.
Sex still is a taboo topic and for that we have such things happening. He is only 10 and I doubt he knows what he's doing. seperti kata Pak Malim, its the pengaruh from the older kids. I say get the mom to talk to him about sex and explain to him the right and wrong.
My oh my...and only 10!
Really wonder what kids are "learning" in school these days...
What happend to runaway from school to memancing and play guli?
Kerp,
Maybe we can agree that being a drug addict is a lesser sin (at least to the wives lah) than main kayu tiga, but I still very much doubt that lying is the solution to Razif's problem.
In the first place, his main problem is to open his mouth to tell his wife he has HIV, regardless of whether or not he intends to lie about the 'how he got it' part. So, when and if he finally manages to open his mouth, might as well tell the whole truth.
Secondly, nak tipu? Don't underestimate the wives lah bro - you think they cannot sniff it at all? I tell you furious wives can become real good interrogators! Unless the husbands are professional liars, chances are there will be inconsistencies in their answers when probed further.
One guy did try to tipu his wife. Dia mengaku pernah main perempuan - but it was before their marriage. The wife masih boleh forgive as long as he did not cheat on her after their marriage. Then the wife started mengumpul "fakta-fakta kes" and figured things out. Last last the husband kantoi juga.
Farina,
From what I've seen so far, Faiz doesn't really listen to his mom - unlike his other siblings. Maybe he needs a fatherly figure, I don't know. I guess that's why Fuzi serahkan kat cikgu sekolah tu to take whatever necessary actions.
But you're right lah, the subject of sex is still a taboo dalam masyarakat kita ni.
Muffin,
Ha'ah lah... whatever happened to memancing and main guli and panjat pokok and whatever other lasak activities ye?!
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