THEY WILL ASK thee as to what they should spend on others. Say: "Whatever of your wealth you spend shall [first] be for your parents, and for the near of kin, and the orphans, and the needy, and the wayfarer; and whatever good you do, verily, God has full knowledge thereof." - Al-Baqarah (2:215)

Saturday, 8 March 2008

To All Women Out There!


8th March, is International Women’s Day. This day last year, my blog posting was a special dedication to HIV women.

This year, since there are too many serious stuff around because of the general elections, I thought maybe we could lighten up a bit – but still on a serious issue… BREAST CANCER. We can still have a good laugh on serious matters and see the lighter side of things, can't we? The following was forwarded to me via email some time ago and I think today is a good day for me to share this with my blog readers.

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GO GET YOUR MAMMIES GRAMMED

For years and years they told me,
Be careful of your breasts.
Don't ever squeeze or bruise them.
And give them monthly tests.

So I heeded all their warnings,
And protected them by law.
Guarded them very carefully,
And I always wore my bra.

After 30 years of astute care,
My gyno, Dr Pruitt,
Said I should get a Mammogram
"OK," I said, "let's do it."

"Stand up here real close" she said,
(She got my boob in line),
"And tell me when it hurts," she said,
"Ah yes! Right there, that's fine."

She stepped upon a pedal,
I could not believe my eyes!
A plastic plate came slamming down,
My hooter's in a vise!

My skin was stretched and mangled,
From underneath my chin.
My poor boob was being squashed,
To Swedish Pancake thin.

Excruciating pain I felt,
Within it's viselike grip.
A prisoner in this vicious thing,
My poor defenseless tit!

"Take a deep breath" she said to me,
Who does she think she's kidding?!?
My chest is mashed in her machine,
And woozy I am getting.

"There, that's good," I heard her say,
(The room was slowly swaying.)
"Now, let's have a go at the other one."
Have mercy, I was praying.

It squeezed me from both up and down,
It squeezed me from both sides.
I'll bet SHE'S never had this done,
To HER tender little hide.

Next time that they make me do this,
I will request a blindfold.
I have no wish to see again,
My knockers getting steam rolled.

If I had no problem when I came in,
I surely have one now.
If there had been a cyst in there,
It would have gone "ker-pow!"

This machine was created by a man,
Of this, I have no doubt.
I'd like to stick his balls in there,
And, see how THEY come out!



OK ladies, now that you have had your laugh, remember...Breast Cancer Awareness... Go have those boobs checked out and stay healthy! Pass the message on to your mothers, sisters, daughters, aunts, cousins ---- even your enemies!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And oh, remember to get enough exercise ya? Keep fit, and stay healthy!


Pic stolen from icanhascheezburger.com

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY!

8 comments:

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Everything’s said for a reminder,
To have em checked makes life better,
If appointments are too much a bother,
Come see me, I’ll be your boob doctor…

Hehehehehehhe…

Ok, I’ll throw myself outta here before the blog owner gives me the broom. Happy International Women’s Day, ladies!

*and happy birthday to uncle Samy Vellu.

Pi Bani said...

Kerp:
You're darn right you'd better get outta here,
A flying broom is heading your way my dear...


*And oh, I don't think uncle Samy V reads my blog lah...

J.T. said...

Notice that some of the most painful things in the world for women were invented or designed by men. :) Another example is shoes. Let me correct that ... high-heeled shoes by male designers. The kind that gives an everlasting backache and pinched toes.

(I wonder if it is pay back for the grief we cause them... hehe)

Anyway, Happy International Women's Day to you too.

Kak Teh said...

pi bani, keep fit, keep healthy and keep doing your wonderful work! Happy Women's Day from one woman to another.

Pi Bani said...

JT:
Pay back time for the grief we caused them? Hmmm... works both ways, don't you think? ;)

Kak Teh:
Yes, yes, am trying my best to keep fit and healthy. You keep well too!

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Kak Pi,

Happy International Women's Day to you too!

*Hugs*

J.T. said...

Of course, it works both ways. ;) That's without a doubt.

Pi Bani said...

Daphne:
*hugs* back to you!

JT:
Hehe... tit for tat! Makes life more interesting, doesn't it?