THEY WILL ASK thee as to what they should spend on others. Say: "Whatever of your wealth you spend shall [first] be for your parents, and for the near of kin, and the orphans, and the needy, and the wayfarer; and whatever good you do, verily, God has full knowledge thereof." - Al-Baqarah (2:215)

Tuesday, 6 November 2007

The innocent children...

Thank you so much to all those who wrote in indicating their interest to sponsor a child. We will forward the list of needy children once we have finalized the list, detailing the background info of each child. With your help, we hope there will be a better future for these children.

Anyway, this morning I got a call from Zali. Remember Zali, the dude whose story I posted here and here? Yeah, his wife left him and the kids in June this year. With Zali's drug addiction, I can understand the part why she left him… but what I don’t understand is why she left the children with him without even considering their well being!! Initially, I thought in time she may miss the children and come back for them. But it has been more than 4 months now and yet there has been no attempts whatsoever from Zali’s wife to get her children or even to find out how they are doing. I DON’T UNDERSTAND!! What wrong did the children do to deserve being deserted by their own mother?

Understandably, the children are attached to the father as he’s the one who had always been staying home while the wife goes out to work. But now that the wife had left them, the children are not getting enough to eat.

From time to time, Zali had been borrowing from his mom who nags every time and but still gave him money anyway (probably thinking of her grandchildren). But I guess she’s no longer willing to lend him money which she knows she will never get back. Zali got so desperate looking for food to feed his two girls, and he didn’t know where else to seek help. Get a job? That won’t be easy. Even for ex-drug addicts it’s not easy to get a job – what more someone who’s still on methadone treatment like Zali. Zali needs to go to the hospital EVERY day for his methadone.

Apparently before Raya recently, Zali managed to get a referral letter from the HIV clinic to seek some assistance from Baitulmal, but when he went there, he was pushed around from one person to another… and ended up empty handed. My guess is that they thought Zali should work to earn a living… but the problem is… who’s willing to employ Zali and give him time off every morning for him to go to the hospital? Besides, in the referral letter it was clearly stated that Zali has HIV, and THAT was probably one of the reasons why he was pushed from one person to another.

When Zali called me this morning, he asked where else he could get help to feed his children. “Tolonglah puan, beras tak ada, susu tak ada… saya dah mati akal dah tak tau mana lagi saya nak cari!” I asked if he could wait until tomorrow so I can send him some groceries. He sounded disappointed at the thought of having to wait another day. His kids haven’t had anything to eat yet for the day and I’m not even sure if they had anything proper yesterday. I couldn’t stand the thought of the two young girls (5 years & +- 2 years old) going hungry without food. Their father may have done a HUGE mistake but they shouldn’t be the ones suffering.

I don’t like what Zali had done in his past, but at least he is trying his best to feed his children, even if he has to beg. His estranged wife on the other hand is working and has a fixed income - the least she can do is to make sure her children gets some food to eat! She has every reason to bring the children to stay with her, but she's not even attempting it. I’m going to say this again… I DON’T UNDERSTAND!!

Anyway, I managed to get some rice, milk, bread, biscuits, sugar, canned food, and some other foodstuff for the kids and promised to meet up with Zali near my NGO center. Zali came with his younger daughter on an old motorbike. I asked where his other daughter was. He said she was at home. That got me worried. A 5 year old girl left alone by herself at home. Oh dear…

When Zali saw all the foodstuff, he was so thankful, he cried. He even said to his daughter, “Hari ni kita boleh makan, adik!” Unlike some who preferred to ask for money, Zali on the other hand was glad his children got something to eat.

Zali really needs to get himself a job. But who’s willing to offer him one? Hmmm… maybe I should try to link him to Bakti Kasih… they are better trained to deal with drug addicts.

On another note, remember my earlier posting here about the male PLWHA who asked Yah to marry him despite not even knowing her full name? And how Yah gave her phone number when he asked for it?

Well, just as I had expected, he had been trying to call Yah at ungodly hours. Yah called me a few days ago saying that the guy had been trying to call her between 1 am to 3 am. (I guess that’s when he feels most lonely?!). When Yah didn’t answer the call, he sent her text messages. I wanted to say padan muka to Yah… but no, I didn’t. Instead I told her, “Itulah, yang gatal gi bagi phone number hari tu siapa suruh?” Hehehe…

Oh don’t worry, I didn’t scold Yah. We ended up giggling on the phone…

17 comments:

Typhoon Sue said...

i pun tak paham.

Pi Bani said...

Sue,
Payah betul nak paham bab ni kan? I wish I can meet the wife face to face and find out what's going on in her mind.

kina said...

Sampai hati dia buat anak dia cam tu...

Kak Pi, nak tanya aje ye... is he willing to give up the girls for adoption?

Pi Bani said...

Kina,
The problem is, nak lepaskan to his mother pun dia tak sanggup. His mother stays in another town and if the children stay with their grandma, he will not be able to see them often as he needs to be in Ipoh for his daily methadone treatment. Not just him, even his daughters tak boleh nak bercerai dengan dia.

If he's willing to give up the girls for adoption, dah lama I carikan...

Nightwing said...

Helo Kak Pi,

Ya..do not understand why things happens to innocent childrens.

Wife should consider taking the kids or at least give them money.

Maybe she wants to start a new life and with kids around maybe 'susah'?

Pi Bani said...

Nightwing,
I haven't met this lady and so I don't really know what's on her mind. So I don't really know what to say about her except that I don't understand her...

Anonymous said...

"When Zali saw all the foodstuff, he was so thankful, he cried. He even said to his daughter, “Hari ni kita boleh makan, adik!” "

Waaaaa....baca ni, I pun boleh nangis!!!Nasib baik la ada K.Pi boleh tolong hantarkan food.

-niasulaiman-

Pi Bani said...

Niasulaiman,
Memang pun adegan menyayat hati. Kesian sungguh tengok muka the girl. I suppose to her going hungry is something normal. Sigh...

Kita ni je yang kadang-kadang baru 10 minit lambat keluar makan dah complain macam-macam.

zaitgha said...

bagi foodstuff pun better i rasa sometimes coz kalau bagi cash, benda lain yg di buat nyer....

drug addict pun sayang anak but tak paham jugak emak nyer....

Pi Bani said...

Zai,
Memang as far as possible we don't give cash direct to these people. Bagi cash nanti, sudahnya nanti duit tu untuk other purposes, they use for some other purposes. While I do get donations in the form of cash, most of the time I prefer to buy necessities to be handed over to the poor. Firstly, to make sure the money tak diguna ke lain. Secondly, untuk memudahkan the poor. For some of them, nak keluar beli barang pun susah.

And yes, in Zali's case, nampaknya the drug addict lebih sayangkan anak compared to his wife who's not an addict. Tak taulah apa I nak kata dah.

Mat Salo said...

This totally don't make sense. A sane mother abandoning her very young children. Girls pulak tu --especially the younger still a toddler!

Perhaps it's time to persuade him to give them up for adoption. I feel it's cruel to leave them with him... And I suspect he knows it too!

Hopefully this sponsor a child thing will be succesful and come in handy.

Pi Bani said...

Mat Salo,
Sounds insane, doesn't it?

I've been trying to coax him to send the children to stay with their grandma. He did say earlier that his mother was willing to take care of the kids but I'm not sure if he was telling the whole truth.

Memang kesian the girls. Not orphans but just as bad as orphans, if not worse.

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

Hmm…I wonder what the two girls were giggling about.

So anyway, I don’t know la Kak Pi. I think she was allured by some other guy and the offer to turn over a new leaf is just too good to resist. If only she knew what her daughters had to go through on daily basis, she might just change her heart and make a you turn. I mean, orang lain baca pon sedih, ni kan pulak maknya. but knowing how weird some people are, she can be totally heartless.

waterlily said...

Salam Kak PI

Saya tidak faham kenapa anak2 yang tidak berdosa perlu dihukum di atas kesalahan orangtuanya. Apalah yang anak2 itu tahu?
W'pun bapanya drug addicted tapi naluri sayangkan anak2 masih ada. Zali masih seorang insan pada pandangan saya. Dan dia perlu dibantu bukan dihukum. Inilah penyakit masyarakat kita - lebih ramai yang menghukum dari membantu

IBU said...

:(

Pi Bani said...

Kerp,
The 2 girls were giggling about the lonely dude @ duda lah! ;)

Anyway, I tak tau nak komen apa lagi about Zali's wife. Maybe, just maybe, if only I can get to speak to her, I'd be able to understand the situation better.

Pi Bani said...

Waterlily,
Menghukum jauh lebih mudah dari membantu. Itulah masalahnya.

Ibu,
Yeah, sad isn't it?