Poor, woman, children, baby...

I was updating my list of PLHIV clients when I realised that I have not been in touch with quite a number of them for some time already. Frankly, since the Education Sponsorship Program started and became my baby, I had to spend more time on the Sponsorship program to ensure that all the recipients get their monthly sponsorship on time. It's a heavy responsibility handling the money the sponsors had entrusted us with, and I take that responsibility seriously. Takutlah handle duit orang!

Despite the heavy responsibility, I am still getting assigned to new clients. The HIV clinic coordinator started with, "Afizah, I am so sorry but I have no choice but to do this... I can't think of anybody else", then he handed me the contact report of the latest PLHIV I've been assigned to. No choice did he say? There are a few buddies with only 2 or 3 clients each and he said he had no choice but to pass this client to me? Ahh, must be a problematic client, I thought. I was right. Most of the cases handed to me are usually with rather similar backgrounds, with 4 major keywords - "poor", "woman", "children" and "baby".

Indeed, as I had expected, this new case is of a poor woman who has 4 schooling children and an 11 month old baby. The contact report was passed to me during our AGM last week but I haven't had the time to call her until yesterday. But yesterday when I called, there was no answer. So I thought I'd try again later today.

This morning while I was at my office, our hotline phone rang (I'm still holding the phone, will only pass it over to another board member during our meeting tonight). A lady was asking for a colleague of mine. She had tried my colleague's personal number but couldn't get through, so she tried the hotline number she got from our brochure. I asked who she was, and when she mentioned her name, ahhh... I thought... pucuk dicita ulam mendatang. The lady was Murni, the client I was trying to call yesterday. She said she was at the hospital, done with her blood test and took her supply of medication, and she was at the cafeteria. She had promised to pass some documents to my colleague whom she met during the last clinic, and so that was why she was trying to call him.

Since Murni was already in Ipoh, and work at the office is not too hectic (well, no deadlines for this week...), I decided to meet up with her myself. I told her to wait at the cafeteria and I'd be there in about 20 minutes. Off I drove to the hospital. But as always, getting to the hospital isn't so much of a problem, but getting a parking space was tough! I tried calling Murni, hoping to get her to wait for me somewhere that I need not park my car, but my calls didn't get through. Somehow at certain areas at the hospital, it's rather hard to get that particular 01_ line. When Murni called earlier, she called from a public phone, not her hand phone. Like it or not, I had to park my car somewhere. After 3 rounds of going round the hospital compounds, finally I got myself a parking space, albeit a bit far.

But I had another problem. Murni and I have never met each other before. I tried to call my colleague, hoping he'd be able to describe Murni to me, but like Murni, my calls to him too didn't get through. So, how was I supposed to recognise Murni? I was not about to make a scene at the cafeteria shouting out Murni's name...

Based on the contact report, I knew she had an 11 month old baby. Hoping that she'd bring her baby along, I started looking for those with babies around that age. But it's normal for people to bring their babies along to the hospital, and the cafeteria itself is very near the pediatric clinic. Aiyo... so how?

I looked around, and saw one lady holding a baby around that age with a small boy sitting in front of her. Somehow they looked like poor kampong folks and my gut instincts told me they must be the people I was looking for. So I went over to the table and asked, "Puan Murni?" And whaddaya know... my gut instinct was right! My first try and I got the right person. Even Murni was amused how I managed to single her out amongst the many people at the cafeteria.

The boy sitting in front of her was her 13 year old son who missed school today to accompany her to the hospital so that he could take care of the baby when Murni does her tests and all. The baby, a cute little not-much-fuss girl, is Murni's daughter from her second marriage.

Oh yes, Murni married twice. With her first husband, she had 5 children. The eldest who is 21, is married and stays in another state. The other 4, age ranging from 11 to 16, are all schooling. Murni's first husband died about 5 or 6 years ago. Murni didn't know much about what he died of... apparently her late husband's family were very secretive.

Less than 2 years ago, Murni remarried. Then she got pregnant, and that was when she found out about her HIV infection. Her present husband has been tested twice, both tests negative. Murni must have got the virus from her first husband.

Murni's present husband does odd jobs to make a living, earning between RM300 to RM400 a month. Even that is not fixed. It's more of an "ada kerja ada gaji" kinda job. No job means no pay. And with 4 schooling children plus a baby who cannot be breastfed by the mother, it's even tougher. Any money that comes in needs to be used to buy milk for the baby and food for the family. And not forgetting, to pay for their house rental of RM150 a month. I asked if the children's schooling needs had been settled. According to Murni, only the basics. Only the exercise books and whatever stationery needed for school. School uniforms, shoes and bags? Use the old ones. Fees or whatever payment they call it at the schools? They haven't paid a single sen. Yes, the school teachers had already asked for whatever payment, but at least they did not pester the kids for it.

Looks like another case to be considered for our Children Education Fund, and probably also for the Sponsorship program. I hope I can find more sponsors. Whatever it is, I will need to visit Murni at home and assess for myself her situation at home.

What about my other clients whom I had not contacted for some time? Well, I'd better contact them soon to find out how they're doing. And maybe it's time that a few of the less problematic ones be handed over to other volunteers as I may not be able to cope with too many of them under me now.

The talk to foreign workers

My effort to come up with a very simple website (using blogspot) here for my NGO is already showing results. You see, despite getting a hotline number for ourselves (usually we use our center phone number on our brochures and letterheads but most of the time there is no one at the center), the number is only displayed on our brochures, given only to a small group of people. What about those who want to know more about HIV/AIDS or those who are looking for HIV related organisations in or around Ipoh but have never heard of the Buddies of Ipoh? How do they search for us?

Nowadays, people always use the internet to look for information. So, if we Buddies don't make our information available on the internet, it will be very difficult for people to find us unless they have contacts who already know about us. It doesn't matter if the info displayed on internet is on a very simple blog site with very basic facts. At least now when people google up "HIV Ipoh", they will find Buddies of Ipoh.

That was how the HR personnel of a factory near Ipoh found us. Their Company has quite a large number of female foreign workers (mostly Indonesian and Vietnamese) and apparently of late there had been quite a few cases of social problems when their staff became pregnant and had to be sent back to their country. The HR personnel thought it would be a good idea to get their workers to learn more of HIV/AIDS, how it spreads, the stigma and discrimination that comes with it, etc, with the hope that the workers will be more careful with their social life.

But the HR personnel did not know anyone in or around Ipoh who'd be able to give the talk and never thought that such an organisation such as ours exists in Ipoh. So she googled up "HIV Ipoh" and that was how she got hold of our contact number. It just so happened that she called when it was my turn to take care of the phone, so the call came straight to me.

So this morning, after putting all the necessary stuff (my laptop, posters and brochures on HIV/AIDS) into my car, before 8 am I was already out of my house. I even had to forgo my Saturday morning pasar tani routine as the management of the factory wanted to start the talk at 8.30 am. Met up with a colleague of mine who agreed to come along with me and off we went. We got to the factory's canteen (where the talk was held) ngam ngam 8.30 am. The factory workers who were "forced" to listen to the talk just finished their shift at 8 am. Probably all they had in mind was to go home and sleep. The only consolation was that, to get them to stay back and listen to the talk, the Company sponsored breakfast for them.

While I set up the necessary equipments (I brought my own laptop but the projector was the Company's), my colleague helped to put up the posters on the wall. Usually if I go alone for talks, I don't put up the posters as there'd be nobody to help me out. Another advantage of having a colleague come along was that I finally had someone to take pictures while I gave the talk. At least our reports later will look more lively with pictures attached, no?

Usually for students, I'd have the slides in English and my explanation in both Malay and English. This time the talk was fully in Malay, both the slides and the explanation. For the benefit of the few Vietnamese workers who may not be too fluent in Malay language, they had one of their colleagues doing the translation for them.

Well, despite the workers all longing to go home and rest, at least some of them were attentive enough. They did respond to my questions and at the end of the talk, a few of them did ask questions. As a matter of fact, one Indonesian worker, came over to get additional pamphlets and brochures from us. Apparently before she came to Malaysia to work, she did get herself involved in an NGO in Indonesia carrying out similar activities. I did ask her if she may be interested to join us, but ahh... as a factory worker with 12 hour shifts, where got time to do voluntary work.

Anyway, after the talk ended and their HR personnel said, "OK, sekarang boleh balik", in less than a minute they were all out of the canteen. They already had a tiring 12 hour shift, I bet they couldn't wait to go home. In fact, maybe a few of them were already cursing this makcik... bilalah nak habis bercakap ni...

It was our first time giving a talk to factory workers. Hopefully this is a start to having more Companies interested in creating awareness amongst their staff.

Various Updates

I have managed to get a few options for Aman (refer my previous posting). A few calls and emails from concerned organisations and individuals came in, providing me with some options. However, to date, Aman has yet to call me although he was supposed to leave his aunt's house by last weekend. I hope no news is good news. Hopefully Aman has found a place to stay... or his aunt decided not to chase him out. Whatever it is, probably I will have to check with SN if Aman comes for follow-ups at the HIV clinic. Usually those who don't show up for follow-up appointments are those who have given up hope. Hopefully that's not the case with Aman.

I am still holding my NGO's hotline phone. The phone rang a few times for the past few days and each time it rang I thought it may be from Aman. But no, Aman didn't call. The calls lately came from the management of a Company, wanting us to conduct a talk on HIV/AIDS for their factory workers - mostly foreign workers ie Indonesian and Vietnamese. Yesterday, 2 of the staff came over to the our center to discuss the matter further. The talk will be held this coming Saturday morning. The workers are not fluent in English, so the talk will have to be held in Malay. Besides, none of our volunteers are able to converse in Vietnamese language! The management will try to get one of the Vietnamese workers who are more conversant in Malay to translate for the Vietnamese workers. The Indonesians shouldn't have any problems understanding Malay... I hope! For all I know I may end up using the Indonesian accent!! (that may help for my Bali trip in August though...)

********************************

Shila sent me another SMS telling me about her health problems again. She kept asking me why she was having such problems... whether the problems were due to the medication she was taking etc. Sigh... why lah these people prefer to ask non-medical people about their medical problems. Apparently when she felt unwell last week, I wasn't the only one she SMS-ed. Another colleague of mine also got her SMS but to that colleague Shila said she didn't have enough money to go to the clinic. To me she never complains about not having enough money for her medical needs. BUT she's always giving me all sorts of excuses not to see the doctor.

This time when she sent me the SMS, again I replied telling her to go to a clinic or hospital. In addition to that I also told her not to assume things and not to wait for her condition to worsen before she decides to see a doctor. Shila came up with yet another excuse...

"Saya takut kalau pergi hospital nanti doktor cakap ada sakit lain pulak, nanti kena tahan kat wad. Tak nak susahkan mak kalau saya masuk wad nanti."

Haiya, this woman! Memang cari pasal nak kena bebel! She thinks she won't susahkan mak if she gets sick at home? But lucky her I was too lazy to membebel that day, so I just told her to go to the klinik kesihatan near her place. Well, she promised she'd go the next morning. I hope she did.

*********************************

We had our AGM last night. Oh, just the usual AGM stuff... adoption of reports etc. And as usual, the election of office bearers too went on like previous years - I propose so and so, I second, I propose nomination closed, I second. That actually went on for every single post where there was no need to vote for anyone. Having just enough quorum for the meeting, we didn't really have many volunteers to choose from, so other than one or two changes here and there, year in year out we'd usually end up with the same faces in the Board. Yeah, so guess who's still stuck as the Chair? :(

After the meeting we decided to take a group photo. OK, ready Buddies... SMILE!!

The lady wearing the tudung had 10 seconds to catwalk to her chair after setting the camera on self-timer.

Out of the above, 10 were elected to the Board. See what I meant when I said we have a shortage of volunteers??

Can anyone help?

I was relaxing at home on Tuesday when SN called me. She was at the HIV clinic then, giving some counseling to a newly diagnosed HIV positive guy. SN wouldn't call me unless she has a favour to ask or a client to refer.

True enough, SN asked if I'd be on clinic duty the next day as there was one particular case she wanted to specifically pass to me. Well, my next clinic duty will be in mid-April and so, that Wednesday (yesterday) the clinic duty was attended by my colleagues.

According to SN, this guy, Aman, a Muslim convert, needs a place to stay. His parents are no longer around, and he's been staying at an aunt's house, (the aunt knows he's a Muslim) but when the aunt found out about his HIV status, she wanted him to move out. She said she'd be coming back in a week's time and she wants him out by then.

Aman used to work at a food court, but ever since he got sick (he found out about his HIV when he was hospitalized recently) he's no longer working. Now that he needs to move out of his aunt's house, and without earning any income, how on earth is he supposed to support himself? And where on earth is he supposed to live? Not only does he need  shelter and moral support, being a new Muslim, he also needs religious guidance.

And so that was why SN decided to call me. I already had other appointments in my office on Wednesday, otherwise I wouldn't mind dropping by the hospital for a while to meet up with this guy. I told SN to just refer him to my colleagues who were on duty so they could take down his details. I trust my colleagues would still refer the case to me.

Just as I had expected, while I was at my office yesterday morning, my colleague who was on clinic duty called to inform me about this guy. I already had some basic info about Aman from SN, so my colleague didn't have to explain much. But I couldn't give an answer there and then as I still need to ask around on where would be the best place to refer this guy to. Only problem was, he doesn't have a phone, and he's about to be chased out of his aunt's house, so how was I supposed to contact him? I had no choice but to tell my colleague to tell Aman to call me in 2 or 3 days time, with the hope that I'd be able to come up with a solution by then.

Meanwhile I've been surfing the web, searching for homes that may accept people like Aman. I know of some shelter homes for HIV+ men, but the ones which would probably give some Islamic guidance are the ones specifically for drug/substance users - and according to what I've been told, Aman is not. His HIV infection was probably due to his bad past. There are a few other shelter homes for HIV positive men, but they are either Christian or Buddhist homes. Yes, there are some homes which are not religion based, but Aman needs religious guidance as well. Yes, there are many Muslim shelter homes - but all for either women or children. For men? Ahh, the old folks homes... but Aman definitely doesn't qualify.

I was browsing the website of a particular Muslim dakwah and charity organisation. I figured this organisation would be the best organisation to help Muslim converts. I just tried my luck by sending in my query - telling them of Aman's situation and asking if the organisation is able to help. When I checked this morning, there was already a response to my query, asking me for Aman's or my phone number. Alhamdulillah... there's hope, I thought. So I quickly replied, saying that Aman doesn't have a phone but is supposed to call me back in 2 or 3 days time. So I gave them my phone number. Again, there was another quick response, telling me that someone will call me. I became even more hopeful.

Before noon, a lady from the said organisation called. I was expecting her to maybe ask for further details and then suggesting to me where I should refer this guy to. But instead the lady said they didn't have the sources for this kind of cases for men, and so she suggested that I refer this case to JKM instead. Aduh, my hopes were dashed! If an organisation supposedly doing dakwah work can't help me out on this one, who can?

Aman still hasn't called me yet. Frankly I'm not sure if I can come up with a solution by the time he calls. I guess the most important thing is for him to get some shelter, so I guess all I can do for the time being is to give him the options of the various shelter homes for HIV positive men.

Aman may be rather weak and fragile at the moment, but if given proper care and guidance, I believe he can get better. And when he does get better, he should be able to work again. But if he becomes homeless and doesn't get any proper care, his condition will only worsen. And probably, so will his faith, na'uzubillah.

Ya Allah, help him please.

 

Apa sakit?

Almost every morning, if it doesn't rain, and if I don't have any early morning assignments elsewhere, I'd be outside my house, doing any of the m's... menyapu, menebas, menyangkul, meracun, mencantas, menebang, mesin rumput and whatever other m's I consider as my 'exercise kampong', before I get ready to go to my office. The list used to include membasuh kereta, but of late, since the existence of the RM3 snow car wash right at the junction going in & out of my kampong, I now wash my car while sitting at the driver's seat, on my way to work. For RM3, it's worth missing the exercise... :-)

Anyway, due to my daily routine, any calls coming in on my hand phone before 8.30 in the morning would usually be unanswered. And any SMS coming in during that time would be replied rather late.

Yesterday, after my usual morning routine, I came in and saw the red light on my phone blinking instead of the green light. That's a notification that there was either a missed call or unread message or a reminder of an appointment. I checked my phone, and noticed there was one missed call and one unread message - both coming from Shila. She had actually sent the SMS earlier, and after not getting any replies within half an hour, she decided to call. That was the unanswered call. I was wondering what the urgent matter was that she couldn't wait for my reply to her SMS.

I read her message - her nose was bleeding, and so she asked me what was wrong with her. She said she was scared.

Yep, some of these PLHIV clients of mine do tend to consult me on things which they should be consulting a doctor instead. In fact there are still people out there who think that I actually work at the hospital. However, Shila knows very well that I'm just a volunteer whose job has nothing to do with the medical line.

Well, I was not about to give my opinion on what I thought was wrong with Shila, so my logical advice to her was to go to a clinic and see a doctor. Then her reply came...

'saya nak makan ubat dulu, mcm mana kak, tapi saya rasa panas la.'

Aduuuh, if she had already decided to just swallow some pills at home no matter what my reply was, might as well not ask me what to do. I don't know what kind of answer she had expected from me. Maybe all she wanted to hear from me was that there was nothing to worry about. Or did she expect me to scare her by saying that it was a life threatening situation?! Or did she actually expect medical advice from me?

Hmmm... or did she expect some kind of jampi serapah from me to cure her?

Hey mambang biru, mambang kuning, mambang hijau (oops, sorry Dalilah!)

Oh well, I guess she just wanted to mengadu hal. I do hope she finally decided to see a medical doctor.

Which reminds me of an elderly relative of mine (dah arwah dah pun...) who got ill and went to the clinic to see a doctor. The moment he got in the doctor's room and sat down, the doctor asked, "Ya pakcik, sakit apa?"

And his answer?

"Kalau aku tau idak le aku jumpa kamu!"

Fuyoo... banyak garang wor...