Visiting Sofie at her newly rented home…

In my earlier posting here, I mentioned about Sofie having to move again after her sister, whom she had been sharing the house rent of RM250 with, was offered free accommodation by her employers near her workplace. With no fixed income, Sofie couldn’t afford to pay RM250 by herself, and so she immediately looked for a new place to rent.

She did manage to get a house at a rental rate of RM150, but nearer to her old place (where the condition was so bad), which means she may need to have her children’s schools transferred yet again. For the moment the children are still schooling at the old school, although they may need to leave their house earlier than usual.

Sofie did tell me (during the Family Day) that she’d be moving to the new place during the week. So on Saturday I called her to ask if she had moved. I needed to visit and bring Saiful, her son, to an optician, as required by the ophthalmologist during his previous appointment. Sofie and her children were all already at the new place. I then asked for the address, and as usual, they themselves didn’t know their new address. I then asked for directions.

“Akak masuk aje *XXX, seberang jalan keretapi tu, sampai kat padang talipon saya. Nanti saya gi ambik naik motor.” (*cannot lah give the actual name of the place kan?)

Again, as I had expected, these clients of mine always ASSUME I know the place they’re talking about just because they are familiar with the place. I know of a pintu gerbang going in to Kampung XXX, so in my mind, that was the place Sofie was talking about.

So when I went this morning, I went straight to the Kampung XXX, but couldn’t find a railway track for me to pass. I then decided to head back to town, where I found a road by the name of Jalan Kampung XXX, and yes, immediately I saw a railway crossing. Drove pass the railway crossing, found the padang, and then I called her. She told me to wait. Within just a few minutes I saw Sofie on a motorbike together with Ika, her youngest daughter.

I then followed her motorbike, and had to pass through some back lanes before reaching her house.

For a rental of RM150, I must say the house is quite spacious. And with not so many things such as furniture, the house looked even more spacious. The moment I walked in, I saw the old mechanical sewing machine that I brought for her last year. Still working and still being used, alhamdulillah.

Further than her old place, but so far things are looking good. She just moved in last week, and already she’s getting orders to supply kuih for the nearby hospital canteen, and also to supply kuih at the nearby pasar ramadhan for the coming fasting month. At least she can work from home, without having to stand too long selling the kuih herself at the hospital canteen or at the pasar ramadhan. And based on the place where she stays, even after Ramadhan she may be able to sell kuih and/or nasi lemak by the roadside near her house.

Yes, so far so good. I do hope she doesn’t have to move again anytime in the near future…

Pre-Ramadhan visits begin…

With Ramadhan approaching and donations starting to come in meant for my PLHIV families, I figured I didn’t really have much time left for me to do my pre-Ramadhan visits.

On Thursday I started buying some groceries – rice, cooking oil, sugar, flour, canned food, biscuits, cordial, etc, thinking of storing them at the Buddies Centre so that whenever I decide to visit any of my clients, I’d just go to the Centre and get the groceries from there.

Right after putting all the stuff in my car, I thought there was still time, so I called Fuzi to find out if she was home. As soon as she said she was home and wasn’t planning to go anywhere, I told her I was coming over. Might as well settle one family first since I didn’t have any other plans. After all, I had already got photos of our Family Day printed and sorted out to be given to the various families, and I’m sure the kids were eagerly waiting to see their photos.

So off I headed to Fuzi’s house. I got there at about 11 am or so…. saw Ijam already in his school uniform, waiting for the school bus to come. Iwan, the youngest boy, was at a neighbour’s house, playing with some friends.

Anyway, Fuzi was telling me her problem with her boys. While the 2 girls had never been a problem for her, the boys tend to befriend naughty boys who would ponteng sekolah as and when they like. Sometimes, when one of the friends decide not to go to school for “not feeling well” (although they were well enough to go out and play), the friend would come over to the house to “cari gang” so that Fuzi’s son too would ponteng as well. Of course Fuzi refused to let her sons ponteng, but sometimes the sons can be very stubborn.

I know it had never been easy for Fuzi. But she’s lucky her 2 daughters had always been responsible and reliable.

On Friday, I promised to meet up with Shila at the hospital after she’s done with some check-up. Told her to give me a call once she’s done.

While waiting for Shila to call, I went to a hypermarket to buy some things for myself. But before I got down from my car, I decided to call Aini to check how she was doing. Aini was the one who got warded last week and had to miss our Family Day although she and her children had always been regulars to the event. I thought if Aini was home then maybe I could visit her at home as well. But Aini said she was at the post office.

I then got down from the car and as I was walking over to the escalator to get up to the hypermarket, I saw a few familiar faces… Aini and 2 of her children!! When she said she was at the post office, I thought it was the post office near her house. But apparently she was at the post office in the same building as the hypermarket!

“Ponteng sekolah ke?” I asked her daughter.

“Mana ada! Ni dari sekolahlah ni…”

It was report card day, and Aini & her 2 children just came from her daughter’s school to get her report card. Aini needed to buy a pair of trackbottom for her son and so after getting the daughter’s report card, they immediately headed to the hypermarket.

“Hah, dah alang-alang jumpa Makcik Afizah kat sini, tunjuk terus keputusan kat dia,” Aini told her daughter. And she responded with, “Alaaaaa…..” but still took out her results anyway. A string of B’s, C’s and D’s… but she still managed to come out top in her class. She’ll be sitting for her SPVM this year.

I showed them some pics of the Family Day that they missed.

“Alaaa bestnya… makcik buat la lagi sekali… untuk kitorang je!”

I was still holding the report card when the girl said, “Tu makcik nak frame ke?” Hehehe… sorry girl, I forgot to give back lah!!

By about 10.30 am or so,  I headed to the hospital. Even though Shila had not called yet, I wanted to see SN at the HIV clinic to ask a few things, particularly regarding payments for the hospital bills. Shila had just got her bill for the time when she was warded some time back, amounting to RM68, which she couldn’t afford to pay because she’s not working. Apparently Aini didn’t have to pay when she was discharged on Monday, she just told the lady at the counter (as instructed to her by SN) that hers was an HIV case, and so she was exempted from payment.

Aini could have still got the exempt from payment by showing her JKM card, like I did for Sofie before. Shila however, does not have a JKM card because she is not getting any financial assistance from the Welfare Department. She has applied, but was told they didn’t approve her application because she had only one child. And after checking with the nurse at the HIV clinic, Shila couldn’t get exemption because of her HIV either. She was warded earlier for something else, not HIV-related, and as such the exemption from payment did not apply in her case.

So how? Well, by the time Shila called me to say she was done with her check-up, I went over to see her, and settled the bill for her. Since we now have our Clients Welfare Fund, we use the funds for cases like this.

Shila’s 11 year old daughter Laila also came along to the hospital to accompany her mother. She self-declared the day a holiday for her because she wanted to follow her mother to Ipoh.

Anyway, by the time we settled the hospital bill etc, Shila was already very hungry. She had to fast before coming to the hospital for some scanning etc, so she hadn’t had anything to eat in the morning. I brought them both to the nearby mall because Shila and daughter wanted to jalan-jalan after that, and immediately took them for lunch at one of the fast good outlets there. Shila and Laila often go to the mall after any of Shila’s hospital appointments, and the daughter would always ask the mother if she could eat at the fast food outlet, but Shila simply couldn’t afford it there. So when I asked if she’d like to eat there (I didn’t know earlier that the girl had always wanted to eat there), Laila just smiled and nodded.

After lunch I left them there and headed home. A few more visits to be done next week, including one to the home of a new client whom I have not met before…

Mixing around with the families…

With more than 60% of the attendees of our Family Day last Sunday consisting of my clients and their families, while the rest, even though not my client, do at least know me other than their own buddy, I made it a point to make sure I chatted with each and every one of them.

Sofie and her 4 children, Lin and her 3 children, Fuzi and her 5 children, Zainab and her 2 children, are all already very familiar with me because I visit them often. And even though I don’t visit the K’s that often, all 4 children are also familiar with me.

I had not met Jay’s children before, usually I’d meet her only at the hospital when the children aren’t around. So yes, I finally got to meet her 3 children. Then there’s Aza, whom I only met once when I visited her at home, before passing her case to somebody else.

When I got to The Roots, a few clients and families were already there. Fuzi and family, Shila and daughter, Kamala and daughter, Pushpa and her aunt (Pushpa is an HIV+ orphan who stays her aunt) plus one male client I wasn’t quite familiar with but I know I’ve met him before.

Kamala & daughter, together with Pushpa & her aunt were going around enjoying the scenery. They were actually looking for Kamala’s buddy, who was supposed to come but didn’t turn up and never even bothered to inform me. But I’ve visited both Kamala and Pushpa before during my assessment visits, so the moment they saw me, they immediately came over to me to say hello. Most of the time during the day the 4 of them were together, but they still joined the rest for the games and activities.

Lin had adult daughters who were like friends to her, so I didn’t really see her chatting much with the rest of the ladies. However I was glad that at the swimming pool, she and her daughters did take the liberty to look after the 2 girls of a client who didn’t come with their parent, as their father was too weak to come. But whenever Lin saw me chatting with the other ladies, she’d take the opportunity to join me in the conversation. I guess she’s just the type who doesn’t know how to start a conversation with people she’s not too familiar with.

One person who didn’t have any problems making friends was Rin. Talkative and friendly, Rin however sometimes tend to forget that not everyone can understand her Parit dialect.

Fuzi and her children, being regulars to our Annual Family Day, had no problems letting their hair down. Her children joined every single activity. Likewise, Sofie’s children had a swell time too, although her eldest son decided not to jump into the pool. Her 2nd son, Azman, the kaki sakat, had a swell time.

The K’s came in full force – all 6 of them. It was nice to see the eldest son Shah (I think he’s 20 this year) taking good care of his 4 year old sister in the pool. The other children too seemed to be enjoying themselves.

For Zainab, it was only her 2nd time joining our Family Day. The first time was back in 2007. This time however, she came only with her 2 daughters. Her husband, however, chose not to come. I guess he wanted to avoid having anyone “lecturing” him because he had been defaulting all his hospital appointments. It was Zainab’s 6 year old who almost got herself drowned when, upon seeing the other older children in the adults pool, decided to simply jump into the adults pool instead of the children’s pool. That happened while Zainab was chatting with one of the other ladies. Then Shila shouted, “Anak siapa tu?!” Upon seeing her daughter struggling, Zainab immediately jumped into the pool to save her daughter. After that both her daughters made sure they remained in the children’s pool.

Hana couldn’t come for the family day as she had to work, but that didn’t stop her children and their grandma (Hana’s mother) from joining us. The grandma just sat around watching over her grandchildren who were having fun in the pool. But she was so sporting, when we were taking the group photo and the photographer said, “OK, freestyle!" she sportingly raised both hands and showed the peace sign.

One of the ladies did mention to a colleague of mine that under normal circumstances, she and her children wouldn’t be able to come to places like this.

At the end of the day, I could see that none of them regretted coming (although I know a few of them, especially the first timers, had second thoughts earlier on whether they should join us). In fact I think they really had a good time. When we were getting ready to go home, first Mrs K came over to me, “Kak, kejap kak… nak bergambar. Along cepat Along, ambik gambar mak dengan Kak Zah!” (note: Mrs K is the only person calling me Kak Zah) Then Rin quickly took out her camera, “Eh, saya pun nak jugak!” and passed her camera to Mrs K’s son. Finally I called all the kaum ibu who were there and we all took a photo together…

The day after the event, I received a text message from Rin, "Jutaan terima kasih banyak pada semua yang terlibat tempoh hari lebih2 lagi akak sebab susah payah untuk kami. Saya dapat banyak kenalan baru yang senasib. Kami happy. Saya doakan semoga akak dirahmati & Allah akan memberkati hidup akak sekeluarga."

Ahh… that made it worth all the effort…

Family Day at The Roots

While I was conducting the committee elections during the TKCOGA AGM on Saturday, a text message came in on my handphone. It came from Halimah, a client of mine who’s supposed to join the Buddies Family Day on Sunday, and whose family was supposed to be picked up by the bus we’ve arranged from Taiping. I was busy then so I figured I’d act on it after the AGM.

By the time I got home, I totally forgot about Halimah’s text message. Fully aware that I’d have another busy day on Sunday, all I wanted to do was to have a good rest. It was only when I woke up on Sunday morning that I suddenly remembered Halimah’s message. Immediately I forwarded the message to the volunteer in Taiping taking care of the northern group.

By 7.15 am I left home – first, to fetch Sofie’s family from their home. Then I immediately headed to the Ipoh bus station as I had promised to meet up with a few families there so we could go together to The Roots in Tanjung Rambutan. Lin’s family was coming by car (one of her daughters who had started working this year recently bought a car) but since they didn’t know the way to The Roots, they wanted to follow my car. Rin, like last year, borrowed her father’s car to come and like Lin, also wanted to follow my car. Then there was Mrs K and family who was supposed to come to Ipoh by bus. Zalia, the young mother whom I just met recently, was also supposed to meet me at the bus station, but when I tried calling her twice, she didn’t answer the phone. I got another volunteer to also come to the bus station so that those without transport could go in her car to our family day venue.

I got to the bus station 10 minutes early. My fellow volunteer had called me to say she may be a bit late as yesterday was also the day for the Ipoh International Run and so all the cars had to give way to the runners.

After a while, I thought I saw Lin and her children pass by in their car. I had already told all the clients to wait at the open space in front of the Poslaju beside the bus station to make it easier for us to wait instead of at the bus station proper which is always busy. When I saw their car pass without entering the area, I immediately called Lin. Her daughter who was driving, went ahead to the nearby Post Office near the railway station instead because as she told her mother, “Macam takde orang je mak…” I told them to turn back and then I waited outside my car so they could see me.

Next to arrive was my fellow volunteer. She had gone to fetch 2 daughters of her client first before coming to meet us. The client was rather weak to join us for the family day, but allowed his 2 daughters to join us. Next came Rin. With her were not only her children but also Mrs K’s children. Apparently, since Rin still had to drive pass their way, she hitched a ride for the children while Mr & Mrs K got there a few minutes later by motorbike.

Since there was space in my fellow volunteer’s car, Mr K parked his motorbike at a safe place and then both he and his wife got into my colleague’s car. It would be much easier rather than having to follow us in their motorbike.

So off we went to The Roots, and we got there just on time – we were supposed to start off with breakfast at 9 am. 2 volunteers and a few clients, including Fuzi and her children, were already there. And since I noticed breakfast was ready, I told those who were already there, to have breakfast first while waiting for the rest to arrive.

The group from north arrived a little while later. Initially a total of 21 people were supposed to join the bus from Taiping but at the very last moment we had more cancellations and finally we ended up having only 9 people (including a volunteer) on the 30-seater bus!

Anyway, we had a spread of mee goreng, nasi lemak, banana cake, coffee & tea for breakfast. After breakfast, I gave them a short briefing on the do’s and don’ts and what activities we had lined up for the day.

We started off with the family event – treasure hunt. With only 4 clues in the form of Malay pantuns, it still wasn’t easy for the families to find the clues, even when they got to the right place!

Then the children took turns for the horse ride.

After that the children were allowed to jump into the pool. One 5 year old girl, upon seeing that quite a number of older children having no problem swimming in the adults pool, simply jumped into the adult pool and almost drowned herself! Luckily her mother saw her, and immediately jumped into the pool to get her daughter. I didn’t see the incident though, I was still with the children who were not done with the horse rides. Only when the girl’s mother, all wet, came to me and told me the incident, I again reminded all the parents to please make sure the children didn’t go where they weren’t supposed to go.

While the children had fun in the pool (we also had a pool game for the kids), some of us decided to enjoy the scenery…

By 12.30 pm lunch was served…

I walked around during lunch to let the children (including the older children) to pick out a number for the lucky draw. With the various sizes of pre-loved toys I managed to get from donors, we figured let them pick their own numbers. And since there were quite a few cancellations, I let the mothers also pick the extra numbers.

So once they were done with lunch, we gave away the prizes – first the prizes for the games then followed by the lucky draw prizes. When I announced that we were about to give away the prizes, some of the children (and their mothers too!) actually tailed me wherever I went!! But at the end of the day, everybody got something to bring home. Each family definitely with more than one prize.

By 2.30 pm, we left the place. Tired, but I could see happiness on the children’s faces… and satisfaction on the volunteer’s faces. We had a jolly good day!

Visiting a client at the hospital

As I was busy calling/texting my clients who are coming for the Family Day, informing them of where to wait, who’s fetching them, what’s the car registration and phone numbers of the volunteers fetching them etc, a call came in from Aini. I had arranged for a trainee volunteer to fetch her at home and I just texted her the name and phone number of the volunteer.

Aini said she was at the hospital, warded. For the past few weeks, she had lost her appetite and had been feeling really weak. Even when she forced herself to eat anything, most of the time, she’d end up vomiting. Her siblings, who saw her looking really pale, had started questioning her on what her ailment really was. None, and I mean none at all, of her family members know she has HIV. Not even her children. But since Aini has kidney problems as well, they easily took her word that her paleness was due to her kidney problem.

On Wednesday, even though it wasn’t her appointment day, the nurse told her to just come to the clinic to see the specialist. She was afraid her condition may be the side effects of one of the ARV medication she was taking. Indeed, when the doctor saw her, the good doc told her to immediately stop the ARV she was taking. And based on her weak condition, she was immediately warded so they could put her on drips. Since she went to the hospital alone, on her own, Aini had to call her father to seek his help to get her things at home and to also take care of her children.

Today I decided to pay her a visit at the hospital. Decided to test my level of fitness as well, so took the stairs instead of the lift. I figured if at any time I felt too tired to continue, I’d just take the lift from whichever floor that I stopped. But nope, I made it all the way to the 8th floor using the stairs.

Aini was still on drip, but she was sitting on a chair, reading a newspaper. She looked much better, in fact she said she felt much better and could already take in food. Definitely her earlier condition was due to one of the ARV she was taking. After she’s discharged later, Aini will have to go see the specialist again, and the doctor will have to start her off on another regime of ARV.

According to Aini, she was told that very likely she can only be discharged on Monday. Which means Sunday’s family day is a definite no for her and her kids. Too bad.

Aini was quite concerned that her daughter, who looks after her at the hospital, may end up looking through Aini’s file and find the word “HIV” there. The girl will be sitting for her SPM this year, and Aini didn’t want news like this to affect her studies. I told Aini to just be prepared to talk to her just in case. Another concern of hers was the hospital bill when she gets discharged. I told her not to worry, since she does get monthly financial aid from the welfare department, all she has to do is to show her welfare card at the payment counter when she or her daughter goes to get clearance for discharge. In any event, I told Aini to just give me a call if she gets into any problem with the hospital bill.

I didn’t see Aini’s daughter outside when I came, but after Aini told me that her daughter spent the night at the hospital to accompany her, when I left the ward I decided to look for her. There she was chatting with a newfound friend who was also accompanying her mother. Aini’s daughter was surprised to see me there since it wasn’t visiting hours yet.

“Ponteng sekolah ek?” I teased her.

“Nak buat macam mana, ada orang tu manja, kena tunggu,” she said, smiling.

Anyway, she said she had already informed her teacher, and she had only missed school for 2 days while tomorrow is already Saturday. Hopefully Aini will indeed be discharged by Monday.

As for myself, after walking up 192 steps to the 8th floor, and still feeling okay, I decided to go down the same way. Yep, another 192 steps, which took less time than going up.